MAYBE YOU SHOULD TALK TO SOMEONE by Lori Gottlieb

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Maybe You Should Talk to Someone is a fascinating look into the world of a therapist and how therapy works.  Sprinkled throughout the book are snippets of psychology, including explanations of defense mechanisms, stages of change, tasks of mourning, and brief glimpses of the contributions of Freud, Erikson, Rogers, Franklin, and others to the field of psychology. It’s almost like getting a psychology education. Profound insights about human nature abound:

...people who are demanding, critical, and angry tend to suffer from intense loneliness. I know that a person who acts this way both wants to be seen and is terrified of being seen.

We marry our unfinished business.

It’s not that people want to get hurt again. It’s that they want to master a situation in which they felt helpless as children.

Sometimes “drama,” no matter how unpleasant, can be a form of self-medication, a way to calm ourselves down by avoiding the crises brewing inside.

...pain can be protective; staying in a depressed place can be a form of avoidance. Safe inside her shell of pain, she doesn’t have to face anything, nor does she have to emerge into the world, where she might get hurt again.

Lori Gottlieb takes us on a journey of self-discovery with herself and her patients. We learn about the world of therapy — how it works, what’s it like from the therapist’s point of view, how change happens, when therapy ends, what’s it like when a therapist goes to a therapist, and much more. 

...therapy is about understanding the self that you are. But part of getting to know yourself is to unknow yourself—to let go of the limiting stories you’ve told yourself about who you are so that you aren’t trapped by them, so you can live your life and not the story you’ve been telling yourself about your life.

...change and loss travel together. We can’t have change without loss, which is why so often people say they want change but nonetheless stay exactly the same.

The things we protest against the most are often the very things we need to look at.

Included throughout Maybe You Should Talk to Someone are conversations between therapist and client.  Over the course of the book, we get to know several of Lori’s patients and their stories. These patients are fascinating and the authenticity of their sessions rings through.

Gottlieb writes well, in a friendly style with much insight, depth and meaning included in every paragraph. I appreciated her discussing her own problems — people often forget that therapists are human and have problems just like the rest of us.  Gottlieb is not shy about revealing her issues and her thoughts as well as the process of therapy she undergoes for herself.

I just need a little crisis management, a few weeks to “process” an unexpected breakup, and then I’ll be good to go. I’ve done therapy before, I say, so I come “preshrunk.”

MRS. EVERYTHING by Jennifer Weiner

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Mrs. Everything follows the lives of two sisters from childhood and throughout their lives, from the1950s until present day.  The older one, Jo is a rebel who is convinced her mother dislikes her and that she is inferior in some way.

...the worst was true. Something was wrong with her. She was broken, she was twisted, she was unnatural, like her mother had said. She would never be fixed or made right.

In contrast, Bethie is the perfect daughter who is more traditional yet also suffers from feelings of inferiority.

...and sometimes—a lot of the time—it felt like her skin no longer fit her, and her body was only a collection of flaws to be fixed or at least disguised, an endless source of despair.

When the two sisters grow up, they switch roles — Jo lives a traditional life whereas Bethie is a free spirit who gets swept up in the counterculture. The story is essentially about each of the two sisters coming of age and then seeking their place in the world and their purpose. They both want to live fulfilled lives and find happiness. There is also a third main character that I would describe as their relationship, which would include the role they play in each other’s life. 

Jo and Bethie are both likable and relatable - there are aspects of each that will certainly resonate with you. We witness their trials and tribulations as well as the key pivotal moments in their lives that ultimately define them. Weiner explores the different choices that women have as times change — a career, a stay-at-home mom, trying to have it all (working and being a mother), etc. We also witness mother-daughter relationships as well as relationships between sisters over the generations.

Besides highly relatable characters, Mrs. Everything includes many topical issues such as sexual abuse by a man in position of authority, LGBTQ, rape, racism, eating disorders, drug abuse as well as historical topics like woman’s lib, civil rights and the counterculture in the 1960s-‘70s.

What was the point of watching her weight now? Once, she’d thought beauty was power, but now she could see that it was just trouble. A pretty face, a cute figure, a smile, all of those were weak spots. They were ways in, and Bethie wanted to be armored, defended, unbreakable.

...she wondered whether they would ever not try to have it all and do it all and do all of it flawlessly. Would the day ever come when simply doing your best would be enough? Her generation hadn’t managed it, and neither had her daughters.

This is the first book I’ve read by Jennifer Weiner and I really enjoyed her writing style. I loved her metaphors/similes and found them particularly clever. I will definitely read more of her work.

She hates me, Jo would think, but even that didn’t hurt so much, because her father loved her, and she could carry his love, like a glowing coal in the center of her chest, feeling its warmth even in the face of her mother’s fury.

            

Her mom reminded her of a rubber band that had been snapped so many times until all of its resilience was used up, and it just hung there, stretched out and useless and limp.

My problem is that a lot of things taste as good as thin feels.

It was as if Jo had bought a ticket for a trip Bethie couldn’t take; like she was already on her way to a country where Bethie would never become a citizen, where she would always speak the language with an accent. Bethie would possibly be able to visit, but she’d always have to leave, to go back to her own place, to stand at the border and wave and mouth I love you across the divide.

VERITY by Colleen Hoover

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Verity is such a fun and entertaining book! Yes it’s creepy and disturbing but it’s also a book you won’t be able to put down.  The twists and turns are endless and the ending was a big surprise. You cannot help wondering what exactly is the truth. Even after finishing this book, you may still not know what to believe.

This book is about flawed people who are Chronics:

... she said we were Chronics. Prone to chronic tragedy. One terrible thing after another.

Some families are lucky enough to never experience a single tragedy. But then there are those families that seem to have tragedies waiting on the back burner. What can go wrong, goes wrong. And then gets worse.

How can you not be pulled in, like I was, by the first sentence?

I hear the crack of his skull before the spattering of blood reaches me.

Hoover teases you along the way, spilling a detail here or there without telling you how or why it happened. But you find out later in the course of the storytelling. She sets up so many juicy plot lines which all become somewhat intertwined.  At times, you cannot help but feel totally disgusted and shocked. You will say, as I did,  “How can a mother behave that way towards her children?” You won’t want to believe it but you will. Then you will become even more disgusted after reading the next chapter! Verity is a helluva ride! This was my first book by Colleen Hoover and it won’t be my last. 

THE LOVELIEST CHOCOLATE SHOP IN PARIS by Jenny Colgan

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The Loveliest Chocolate Shop in Paris is delightful and engaging. It transported me to France with its vivid portrayal of the City of Lights and had me craving chocolate with such rich descriptions that I could almost taste it!  

We first meet our protagonist, thirty-one year old Anna at the chocolate factory, where she has just had a serious accident. The first sentence drew me right in and I was hooked.

The really weird thing about it was that although I knew instantly that something was wrong—very, very wrong, something sharp, something very serious, an insult to my entire body—I couldn’t stop laughing.

Anna is taken to the hospital where she rooms with Claire, her high school French teacher. Anna never cared much about school but she is now a captive audience and Claire insists she reacquaint herself with the language under her tutelage. After several weeks in the hospital, Claire arranges for Anna to go to Paris to apprentice at a famous chocolate shop owned by an old friend. Then the story really takes off as we watch Anna learn her way around Paris, settle into the apartment she shares with Sami, a flamboyant man who works at the Paris Opera in the costume department, learn about making gourmet chocolate and become acquainted with Thierry, the owner of Le Chapeau Chocolat.  

Throughout the book there is a parallel narrative contained in short and separate sections, of Claire at seventeen first going to Paris as an au pair and her experience there, especially meeting Thierry and the development of their relationship. So for example, as Anna learns about the opportunity to work at the chocolate shop, we also read, in the next section, about Claire’s au pair position with her mother’s pen pal in Paris. I enjoyed the juxtaposition of these two narratives and felt that I was getting a second story while catching up on a back story.

The Loveliest Chocolate Shop in Paris is charming and heartwarming with a tiny bit of sadness. It explores the fish out of water concept of living in a foreign country as well as first loves and second chances. The characters are likable and have been well developed. The story may be a tad predictable at times but it did not detract from my enjoyment. It’s a light and quick read that would be perfect as a beach read or an escape from a snowstorm.

Thank you to Sourcebooks Landmark and NetGalley for an advance ready copy in exchange for my honest opinion.

THE KEEPER OF LOST THINGS by Ruth Hogan

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I simply adored The Keeper of Lost Things and highly recommend it. It is a charming, heartwarming, and enchanting book comprised of two distinct stories plus mini-stories sprinkled throughout. It is a tale of redemption and finding one’s place and purpose in the world. This book has a little of everything — romance and friendship, love and loss, heartbreak, redemption, and hope with a touch of mystery and the supernatural.

One story involves Laura, who inheritance a house filled with lots of lost things and must try to return as many as she can to their rightful owners. She has help from Freddy and Sunshine, a Down’s syndrome teen who inadvertently says the funniest things. For example, instead of the broadband man, she says “bored van man.” Also, when she conducts a sort of wedding, she says — “Dreary beloved...in holy macaroni...to love and to perish with death now you start... let no man steal their thunder.”

The other story, told in a different timeline, deals with Bomber, a publisher, and his best friend/assistant Eunice. Ruth Hogan is a masterful storyteller because she weaves together these two disparate stories in a very clever way. In addition, she tells these marvelous mini-stories about some of the lost items that are very entertaining and satisfying just by themselves. There are several scattered throughout the book and each time I came across one, I knew I was in for a special treat.

The Keeper of Lost Things is such a delightful read and is very well written.  Hogan is skillful at story structure as well as the use of metaphors.

...the wonderful thing about books was that they were films that played inside your head.

...his lips locked on to my face like a lunar module docking.

BOTTLE GROVE by Daniel Handler

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I had high hopes for this book because of the writing talents of Daniel Handler. However, I was disappointed, perhaps because the bar was set too high due to A Series of Unfortunate Events.

As I read, I found myself not caring about anyone or what would ultimately happen to them.  I kept reading, until the very last page, because I was hoping and expecting it might develop more — the story, the characters and/or the relationships. But it never did. I neither felt invested in the story nor did it matter to me what happened next or at the end. I didn’t feel like I got to know any of the characters well enough to care. They all seemed rather selfish, entitled and self-absorbed.

At times, I found myself re-reading paragraphs several times because I was confused. Nothing seemed to flow - the story, the characters or the relationships. The story-telling felt disjointed at times leading to more confusion. There were some great metaphors throughout the book but the writing was not up to par of what I expect from Daniel Handler.

Bottle Grove never lived up to expectations and while they may have been high, this book fell very far short. 

THE ROSIE RESULT by Graeme Simsion

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The third and final installment in the Don Tillman series is called The Rosie Result. Once again, Don Tillman is so much fun as a narrator b cause he is endearing and charming with his quirkiness due to Asperger’s. Early on in the story, Don, Rosie and their son Hudson move back to Australia from NYC. The story is centered around Don and Rosie dealing with their son’s issues while navigating their own lives and problems. The Rosie Result has a lot to say about the autism spectrum and does so in a reader-friendly way. Many will learn more about it and feel more empathy toward those who live on the spectrum.

Hudson is having difficulty adjusting to the move. Don changes careers in order to play a larger role in raising his son. Hudson, like his father, has meltdowns that cannot be controlled. In fact, there are quite a few similarities between Hudson and Don. The school, who believes Hudson is autistic, badgers Don and Rosie to have Hudson officially diagnosed but they refuse primarily because it won’t change anything plus it may have a negative effect on their son.

Don is determined to make a difference in Hudson’s life and assist him with overcoming his deficiencies. Don creates “The Hudson Project” much like he originally created “The Rosi Project.” He outlines the areas in his son’s life that need to be improved. Don wants to help him to have a successful like and sets out to teach him social skills, riding a bike, greeting people, team sports, dealing with anger/conflict, etc. Hudson is uncomfortable socially and only has one friend. The reader observes him slowly coming out of his shell and finding his own way in the world. It is a remarkable and very satisfying transformation that will leave you feeling happy and joyful. Don also continues to make progress on his own journey to fit in better in this strange world.  While he is still very rational and objective, his emotions are emerging as he continues to grow. 

I love this family and I am going to miss them a lot, especially Don. Through the course of the three books, we’ve come to know their friends very well as pretty much the same ones populate all three books.  This is a fun series that will have you laughing out loud and smiling a lot. All in all, an extremely satisfying and enjoyable conclusion to the previous two books. Do yourself a favor and first read The Rosie Project followed by The Rosie Effect before reading this one in order to achieve maximum enjoyment.

Thank you to Text Publishing Company and NetGalley for an advance reader copy in exchange for my honest review.